Wednesday, September 30, 2009

New Jersey

Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right. It's a good way to scare people entering the highway.

Speed limits are arbitrary figures to make NJ look as if it conforms with other state policies; these are given only as suggestions and are readily enforceable.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

New Jersey

A right lane construction closure is just a game to see how many people can cut in line by passing you on the right as you sit in the left lane waiting for the same jerks to squeeze their way back in before hitting the construction barrels.

Turn signals are just clues as to your next move in road battle so never use them.

Monday, September 28, 2009

The Blonde Hooker

She was tall, thin and beautiful. She was also a hooker that knew her good looks wouldn't last forever. She needed to find a new line of work, but she was also blonde and had that long list of perfectly good excuses not to, besides she had a 3-year lease at a really crummy apartment. She really loved that apartment because it was so convenient to the train station, especially important for the commute her new job at Walmart. But could she stock shelves in a short skirt and high heels.

Awww...Mondays

Join us every Monday for Awww...Mondays. Post a picture that makes you say Awww...and that's it.

Make sure you leave a link to your post here and I'll visit your Awww...Mondays post. What better why to start the week than with a smile.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

This Week in Entrecard

This is a great big thank you for last weeks advertisers. For those that I honor each week/month I'm well aware of the dedication you show. In order to stay in the top of the heap you're dropping EC every single day. Many of you have more than one blog and that's 300 drops per day per blog.

Entrecard Changes

Well, here we go again with the paid ad thing. First there wasn't going to be paid ads, and now there are. I'm not sure just how this will work, but everyone that knows me knows I don't do paid ads. OF. ANY. KIND. It appears that none of us have a choice in rejecting paid ads when the new policy kicks in on Monday. Well, for those of us that refuse to do ads that doesn't leave us much choice does it?

Saturday, September 26, 2009

The Story Game

It's time to play The Story Game again. I just want you to have something entertaining to do if you swing by for a visit this weekend while I'm off boating. So play nice. Okay?

Here's how it works. I'll start a story. You continue it in comments. Each commenter picks up where the last left off. Next week I'll give it an ending and post our story with the links to everyone who participated under the heading, "Contributing Authors". You can play as many times as you want and the game will run all weekend. Thanks for playing along.

Blog Award

Katherine of iTravel gave me the Open Source Blog Post award. Thank you so very much for thinking of me.

The rules:

Friday, September 25, 2009

Most Inspirational

Jackie (aka: Shinade) of The Painted Veil gave me the Most Inspirational Blog award. Thank you so much for always thinking of me honey. Big hugs.

Here's what Jackie said about this award along with her picks:

The Marine Story

A U.S. Marine squad was marching north of Fallujah when they came upon an Iraqi terrorist, badly injured and unconscious. On the opposite side of the road was an American Marine in a similar but less serious state. The Marine was conscious and alert and as first aid was given to both men, the squad leader asked the injured Marine what had happened.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Role Model?

First, do the simple math below, then scroll down to find your hero.

It's CRAZY how accurate this is!

1) Pick your favorite number between 1-8

2) Multiply by 3 then

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

The Blonde Cookbook

Monday
It's fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

The Stranger

A few years after I was born, my Dad met a stranger who was new to our small Texas town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer and soon invited him to live with our family. The stranger was quickly accepted and was around from then on.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Awards Extravaganza

Silly Willy and Fluffy of The World of Silly Willy and Fluffy along with Mike of Rambling Stuff AKA: Golch Central both gave me the Friendship Blog award.

Thanks to all three of you. Hugs all around as well.

Awww...Mondays

Join us every Monday for Awww...Mondays. Post a picture that makes you say Awww...and that's it.

Make sure you leave a link to your post here and I'll visit your Awww...Mondays post. What better why to start the week than with a smile.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

This Week in Entrecard

This is a great big thank you for last weeks advertisers. For those that I honor each week/month I'm well aware of the dedication you show. In order to stay in the top of the heap you're dropping EC every single day. Many of you have more than one blog and that's 300 drops per day per blog.

Religion?

After the Baptism of his baby brother in church, little Dennis sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car.

His father asked him three times what was wrong.

Finally, Dennis replied, 'That priest said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, but I want to stay with you guys.'

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Comment Game

It's time to play the comment game again. We are in Rio Vista for the Commodores Picnic (by boat of course). Now play nice okay, and have a terrific weekend.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Tulane Study

A study conducted by Tulane's Department of Psychiatry has revealed that the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Da End...

Reverend Bordreaux was the part-time pastor of the local Cajun Baptist Church, and Pastor Thibodaux was the minister of the Covenant Church across the road. They were both standing by the road, pounding a sign into the ground, that read:

"Da End is Near! Turn You self Around Now! Before It's Too Late!"

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Mergers...

With all the turmoil in the market today and the collapse of Lehman Bros and the acquisition of Merrill Lynch by Bank of America, this might be some good advice. For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks. Watch for these consolidations later this year.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Stock Market

CEO -- Chief Embezzlement Officer.

CFO -- Corporate Fraud Officer.

BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Awww...Mondays

Join us every Monday for Awww...Mondays. Post a picture that makes you say Awww...and that's it.

Make sure you leave a link to your post here and I'll visit your Awww...Mondays post. What better why to start the week than with a smile.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

This Week in Entrecard

This is a great big thank you for last weeks advertisers. For those that I honor each week/month I'm well aware of the dedication you show. In order to stay in the top of the heap you're dropping EC every single day.  Many of you have more than one blog and that's 300 drops per day per blog.

New Priest

The new priest is nervous about hearing confessions, so he asks the older priest to sit in on his sessions. The new priest hears a couple confessions, then the old priest asks him to step out of the confessional for a few suggestions.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

The Parrot

A magician was working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean. The audience would be different each week, so the magician allowed himself to do the same tricks over and over again.

There was only one problem: The captain's parrot saw the shows every week and began to understand what the magician did in every trick. Once he understood that, he started shouting in the middle of the show.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Project 2996

As a member of Project 2,996 it is my honor to celebrate the life of Nestor Andre Cintron. Today I will reflect on September 11, 2001 and remember how I felt that morning. How much of the world felt that morning.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

The Story of Me

One day, long, long ago, there lived a woman who did not whine, nag or bitch...

But that was a long time ago and it was just that one day.

Hat tip: Rhonda of Led Beside Still Waters

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Awesome Blogger Friend

Ettarose of Sanity on Edge gave me the I Am An Awesome Blogger Friend award.

What makes this so special to me is why Ettarose created this award...

Helicopter

One day Bordreaux walked into Thibodaux's house and asked him may what's that in ya front yard??

Thibodaux said, "may it a helicopter."

Bordreaux says, "may a helicopter. What it do?"

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

The Mistress

A husband and wife were having dinner at a very fine restaurant when this absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big open mouthed kiss, then says she’ll see him later and walks away.

The wife glares at her husband and says, “Who the hell was that?”

Monday, September 7, 2009

Awards Monday

Pam of Finding Pam gave me the Life is Like a Box of Chocolates award. I love it. Thank you so very much Pam. Big hug.

Here's what Pam said about this award:

Awww...Mondays

Join us every Monday for Awww...Mondays. Post a picture that makes you say Awww...and that's it.

Make sure you leave a link to your post here and I'll visit your Awww...Mondays post. What better why to start the week than with a smile.

Sunday, September 6, 2009

This Week in Entrecard

This is a great big thank you for last weeks advertisers. For those that I honor each week/month I'm well aware of the dedication you show. In order to stay in the top of the heap you're dropping EC every single day.  Many of you have more than one blog and that's 300 drops per day per blog.

Test Questions

Answers Given By Students To Test Questions On The Bible:

The first book of the Bible is Guinessis.

Noah's wife was called Joan of Ark.

Lot's wife was a pillar of salt by day, but a ball of fire by night.

Saturday, September 5, 2009

Young Dave

Young Dave was courting Mabel, who lived on an adjoining farm out west in cattle country. One evening, as they were sitting on Dave's porch watching the sun go down over the hills, Dave noticed his prize bull doing the business on one of his cows. He sighed in contentment at this idyllic rural scene and figured the omens were right for him to put the move on Mabel.

Friday, September 4, 2009

Friendship Blog Award

Jackie of The Painted Veil gave me the Friendship Blog award. Thank you so much Jackie. Someone must have told you that I love awards. Big hug.

The Friendship Blog Award above implies:

Afraid of the Dark

A little boy was afraid of the dark. One night his mother told him to go out to the back porch and bring her the broom.

The little boy turned to his mother and said, "Mama, I don't want to go out there. It's dark."

The mother smiled reassuringly at her son. "You don't have to be afraid of the dark," she explained. "Jesus is out there. He'll look after you and protect you."

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Dad?

One day, a father and his son were walking in the woods on their way home when suddenly they came upon two dogs mating in the brush.

"What are they doing, Dad?" asked the small child, staring intently at the scene before them.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Your Bra?

A man walked into the ladies department of Myer's and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, 'I'd like to buy a bra for my wife.'

'What type of bra,' asked the clerk.

'Type?' inquires the man, 'There's more than one type?'

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

In Heaven

1st Woman: Hi! My name is Wanda.
2nd Woman: Hi! I'm Sylvia. How did you die?

1st Woman: I froze to death.
2nd Woman: How horrible!

1st Woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm and sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you?